Copacabana, Rio de Janeiro: 27oC, warm, sunny, and slightly overcast.
I have just slept my first night in Flamengo in the same flat with my fifteen-year-old daughter and my ex-wife. I got up early at about 5 p.m. and exercised at the local park.
I also passed in the local Portuguese baker’s for a coffee and bread to take back. Yasmin and Nalva got up at about 10 a.m., and until 6 p.m., all of us worked hard to get rid of as much stuff and clutter as possible to put the flat in order.
It is a one-bedroom flat with a small living room and kitchen; everything is small. Besides the reduced size of the flat, Nalva is a potential future hoarder as there is a lot of everything: tiny, insignificant things. My ex-wife is from humble beginnings where she is one of fifteen siblings; she is exceptionally proud and never admits she is wrong, not even slightly, so it could be difficult.
My reason for moving in with them is that I eventually will have to go to England to visit my mother and tie up some things that need to be done there. I do not know precisely how long I will be staying in England as there is also a question mark concerning my mother’s health.
I may have to stay longer or indefinitely if she is not so good. So, renting a new flat now is not logical and staying with Yasmin and her mother will allow me to save money and resolve some issues before going.
Things such as my teeth that I had begun the treatment but not yet finished, a second copy of my Brazilian ID as the original was robbed and some more minor issues that are not so important but need to be done.
Nalva is well-intentioned but complicated in some ways, as we all are, including myself. I also feel that she is 90% emotional and 10 % rational, which, in reality, makes her a walking time bomb. I like and respect her and want her well as she is the mother of my second daughter.
I also feel that the main reason I am here is to help her and, consequently, give my daughter Yasmin a better quality of life. This means improving the current flat they are living in and maybe seeking a better place for them before going to England.
So, Sunday was for throwing as many things away as possible. As I said, my ex-wife is a potential hoarder, and it has become evident that it is difficult for her to get rid of anything. However, I have to give credit where credit is due; we got to throw sacks and sacks of things, stuff and clutter away.
And when I say “to throw away”, it can either mean to throw away physically or to give away to somebody else, but it has to go; it has to leave the flat’s front door and never return.
If you let it, getting rid of stuff and clutter is a highly liberating experience. Besides having more room and living space, which is a form of luxury, less clutter in your home makes your life more fluid, manageable and lighter.
At 6 pm, everything was more or less in order in the first phase, so we went for dinner at a simple restaurant nearby to celebrate. It was enjoyable, and it is good to feel that we have done something positive to improve our lives. A new stage in my life is beginning, and another chance to do something good.
I am 57; time is like sand falling through an open hand. We have to do things now; there is no future to delay!
IT IS TIME TO BUILD!
IT IS TIME TO CORRECT OUR LIVES!
IT IS TIME TO BE HAPPY AND FEEL GOOD AND REALISED WITH YOURSELF!
Thank you very much.
Thanks for reading my blog. Check out my other posts and share your thoughts in the comments.
Richard
