Saturday brought extreme highs and lows. My mother isn’t happy with me going out with someone.
I believe it’s a mix of jealousy, selfishness, and her sociopathic tendencies. I’ve brought out a dark side in her since I started seeing Julie. Things were good and reasonably stable until I had a female friend, and it’s starting to impact my mental health and my relationship with Julie.
In the morning, it was a beautiful day with the sun shining and a blue sky, and I woke up feeling happy, almost euphoric. I did some exercise and got ready to go out to the café on the green. I sent a cheeky message to Julie asking why she didn’t come and join me for a coffee there. It is her day off. I told her not to text me, giving me an excuse if she wasn’t going to come, and said we would talk later.
It’s a kind of checkmate situation where people sometimes automatically say no to something or someone, or to something that suddenly seems unusual. Before they give a negative reply, you tell them that if it’s going to be negative, they shouldn’t tell you, and you don’t want to know either way. Without any explanation or excuse, it simply is or it isn’t.
I went to the cafe, which had only a few tables occupied at first, but it quickly filled up with people. The owner, Jim, a Scotsman who is extraordinarily kind and helpful, always comes to chat with me when the place isn’t very busy. I ordered and paid for a tea with limes, sat down, and started to journal.
After half an hour, the place was bustling with people. I was nearly finished, and there was no sign of my beautiful, little, perfect woman. I finished my journaling, sent some messages to Brazil, and packed up my things to buy a cappuccino before heading out. I bought my cappuccino and decided to sit outside first, and out of nowhere, my flirt, my beautiful little perfect woman, appeared — and suddenly, everything was good again.
She went to the counter at the back of the cafe to buy herself a coffee. I followed her and said I would pay. We then went outside the cafe, where there is a row of tables and chairs in front of the windows of the cafe, and to my surprise, she had brought her dog, a Cockapoo, half Cocker Spaniel, half Poodle called Austin.
Obviously, she had talked to me about him before, but in real life, he is not as small as I thought he would be; he’s taller than a Cocker with champagne coloured fur and an expressive face with his charming moustache and beard and what a personality.
“He’s got so much personality that the only reason he doesn’t speak is that if he did, he’d have to work!” – It’s a Brazilian expression!
Dogs are not permitted in the cafe because the owner’s wife, Jo, is supposedly allergic to them. Julie, upon her arrival, asked a couple outside to hold Austin’s lead while she went inside to find me and get a coffee. Another cafe customer, a local, a native of Wordsley, arrived with his Rottweiler, Roxy. Despite being a much larger dog and having the reputation that Rottweilers sometimes have, Roxy is a very gentle dog. It’s not quite what you would expect from this breed, and the two were ok together.
Julie looked fantastic, simple yet beautiful, in flat black trainers, black leggings, a blouse, and a jeans jacket on top, very stylish.
I felt that she was a little nervous because she works in the cafe, and the same people who had suspected that something was happening between us, and now it is out in the open, confirmed for everybody to talk about; It’s a village. The coffee came, and her colleague Diane, who served us, made an ironic comment about us not being very discreet, but everything was good. We talked and laughed with other people and played with the dogs, and it was a special moment.
I had to go because I needed to take my mother to the supermarket. Julie and Austin had come walking, which is at least 3 kilometres. I said I would walk with them, and I walked at least half the way until she said it was not necessary to go any further with them. It was a moment that felt as if we were married — she, her dog, and me. It was very pleasant. When she got home, she thanked me, and I told her it was not necessary. I had enjoyed this special moment just as much as she did, if not more.
Her dog, Austin, is quite extraordinary to say the least!
I took my mother to Sainsbury’s supermarket, where we did the weekly shopping. Now, my mother is impatient with everything, everyone, and mainly with me. We got back home, put everything away, and Julie texted me, and we arranged to meet at 4:00 in the afternoon.
At 4:00 p.m., Julie was outside waiting for me in her Mini Countryman, which now has various clothes of mine on the back seat. Not as if we had done anything sexual, just getting into the car and leaving something behind, as the car’s heater is too efficient, and sometimes it’s too hot inside, causing me to forget I had left something there.
I got in, we kissed, and we were matching—our jackets, jeans, almost everything. The destination was Bewdley, one of the most beautiful, idyllic, quaint villages in England, just a half-hour drive from where we were. We arrived in the town, and it was raining, so wandering around wasn’t ideal. We parked behind the main High Street, near the river that divides the town. We tried to walk about a little, but the rain persisted, growing heavier and heavier.
We entered the main pub, and there were a lot of people. Julie wanted a beer, and I a glass of wine, and this was when things started to go temporarily downhill. We were fine, we talked, but I was on edge because of my mother before I had left home.
The atmosphere at home has become very heavy and toxic, and when I went out tonight, I was not feeling well. The wine seemed to make it worse, but the conversation was enjoyable, and I was glad to be with Julie. However, I was in pain inside; my mother can sometimes be quite cruel and hurtful in a passive-aggressive manner, and he had affected me, with the wine bringing it all to the surface.
We left the pub to find an Indian restaurant. The most famous one was very close, but we discovered another one nearby that looked very posh and interesting. We went in and asked for a table, and for some reason, they took a long time to receive us. An Indian maître finally appeared and said he had a table ready.
I, seemingly out of nowhere, suddenly said, “Well, it’s not rocket science”. I don’t know why I said it or where it came from. Still, Julie looked at me strangely, a little shocked. The maître guided us to the table, and when we arrived, he said that we were lucky, as it is usually swamped. Still, he showed that he was surprised by the comment, just like Julie and me.
Again, I do not know what happened or what made me say that. Looking back now, I am sure it was a combination of anxiety, the stress I am starting to feel with my mother, what I am currently experiencing at home, and the wine that triggered it. The following half-hour saw Julie crucifying me, trying to understand what had truly happened. I believe many good things are happening to me, and I am very grateful; however, deep down, I feel a sense of sadness.
We ordered the food, and it arrived. It was good, not outstanding, but good. After a lengthy conversation, things got better, especially between us, and I felt more relaxed and at ease. When we left the restaurant, we considered walking around the town, but the rain was falling too heavily, and it didn’t seem like it was going to stop any time soon.
We passed by the same pub and hotel as before and saw a small corner with seating, isolated from the central part of the pub, with fewer people and a more intimate, cosy setting. It was in front of the entrance, but since it was an old pub and hotel, there were many secluded corners. We decided to have coffee there. I got the coffee, and we sat alone, talking and kissing. Julie leaned on me, and I supported her, like in a half-hug. We watched people coming and going, some drunk, and many wearing crazy clothes.
It was amusing!
This was the second special moment of the day. The first was in the morning with Austin; even though it was brief, it was terrific. The second was us in each other’s arms, occasionally kissing but always talking and enjoying each other’s company. Julie had noticed and thought that we were very good just being the two of us together, and I believe it’s true, but with Austin, too, it’s even better.
We stayed at the pub, relaxing and chilling out together for about an hour. After we left, got in the car, and in about half an hour, I was home—another experience of ups and downs with my beautiful, little, perfect woman. Only the future will tell what will ultimately happen.
In bed by midnight.
Thank you.
Thanks for reading this blog post. Please explore my other posts and share your thoughts in the comments section.
Richard
