Wordsley, Stourbridge, England: 11 degrees, sunny but slightly cloudy.
Just a typical Friday with classes running late into the evening.
The weight of the week is beginning to show, and I am feeling tired. This is normal and common; if I were in Brazil, it would be the same. However, what differs is working until 10 or 11 p.m., which is not usually the case.
If I were in Brazil, I would never consider working until so late, giving classes. Brazil is three hours behind England, so everything is delayed or happens later than in England. A class at 7:00 a.m. in Brazil is 10:00 a.m. in England, so the last class at 7:00 p.m. in Brazil is at 10:00 p.m. in England, ending almost at 11:00 p.m.
For some reason, I have adapted easily to this. I have mentioned it before, and I repeat it. I think my body is still a little on latent Brazilian time and not so much on English time. This will change a little from Sunday because the clocks in England will go forward by one hour, resulting in a time difference of four hours.
England is growing on me exponentially, and one of the main reasons for that is having my girlfriends. Julie called me, as she always does, after her work at least three or four times a day. Our relationship is new, fresh, and we are talking and messaging each other all the time.
One of our pep talks today was about what we really are as a couple. After a lot of deliberation, we both agreed that we are dating, in American English, or going out together in British English. I have no problem with this; we have a connection, a vibe, and so far, everything seems to be good.
Let’s see where it goes!
I didn’t come to England to find a girlfriend, let alone a future wife, and even less confusion or distraction. Julie has her issues with her separation and divorce, and I need to sort out my life and earn more serious money. I also have to decide how I want my life to be in terms of where I want to live. I know this isn’t as important or urgent right now, and it will be sorted out again, as life will steer me in the right direction.
What I do not want to do is lose what I have in Brazil, including my relationship with my daughters and, in some ways, with their mothers and my life there. New opportunities are opening up, but we cannot spread our energy over everything.
It must be appropriately directed, but I do not want to lose what I already have in Brazil with my family. Nalva, I will always support, and Yasmin, of course, goes without saying, and she can come to England to stay in the future, whether temporarily or for a longer period.
Jessica has her life with Mario; however, she has a second home here, and if anything happens, she knows I will be by her side no matter what. There is also the tradition of meeting or visiting on special occasions, such as bank holidays, birthdays, and end-of-year events, which the advent of modern communication has further enhanced. Today, a person can speak to anyone in the world via laptop or mobile phone at no cost, if they have an Internet connection, Wi-Fi, or a data plan.
Cibele, whom I haven’t mentioned much, has her life in Rio near Jessica. We have always been close, but never as a possibility to get back together. I have felt that in the last couple of years, she has grown older, and I have not; there seems to be a natural distance between us, which is a pity since she’s the mother of my daughter.
I really do admire and respect her as a person, and I believe she knows that. If she needs anything, I will be there for her. If I stay in England or Europe in general, she can visit me at any time.
All aspects of my life are showing signs of change, and I need to stay aware and prepared for what is ahead. We are never 100% ready for the future; we can try to minimise shock and damage through preparation, but it will never be entirely enough. The ‘winging it’ factor will always appear, and when it does, we should not be afraid to face the flak; it will be resolved even head-on.
Julie and I talked quite a lot during the day. I saw her at the café, but since it’s her workplace, there’s not much I could say or do. When she got home, we had a proper chat; one conversation lasted more than an hour and a half, which was quite crazy for people our age to do, but it was still nice.
The last class was at 9:00 p.m., and I was in bed by 11:00 p.m.
Thank you.
Thanks for reading this blog post. Please explore my other posts and share your thoughts in the comments section.
Richard
