Wordsley, Stourbridge, England: 14 degrees, sunny with showers.
It is curry night at Wetherspoons.
Julie likes Indian food, specifically curries, and it is curry night at every Wetherspoons in England every Thursday. Funny enough, there is no discount or special price for Thursdays, and Indian curries are offered all week round during Curry night at Wetherspoons.
I woke up with a cough and only feeling 50%. A cold had set in, and I will have to weather it for the next few days. Usually, when I have a cold, the first couple of days are very bad, like a ‘man flu’, and when it breaks, I’m 80% better, but it still lingers for 7 to 10 days. Only after that do I feel 100%.
I wasn’t feeling up to exercise, so I made myself a coffee, spoke with Julie for over half an hour on the phone, and then continued with my daily routine, except for exercise. I gave classes, and everything went well. Despite having a cold, I still wanted to have a curry in the evening with Julie. I had pre-arranged to change a class so I could be with her at a time that would not be too late.
What I found strange was that usually, when Julie finishes work, she calls me or sends me a text message. She hadn’t done either; perhaps she was busy with something that prevented her from sending news, or she didn’t want to. And this is the point: a man shouldn’t chase after a woman. He must do his own thing, and if the woman is interested or wants to take it further, she’ll show it by investing in it, but not by playing games.
A man must maintain a particular posture and composure with a woman. If she senses that it is too easy, or that he is too readily available, on all fours for her, which is a Brazilian expression, she might not respect him as much in the future.
I am not implying that a man needs to be a bastard, a son of a bitch, insensitive or complicated. All he needs to do is to be a man and a gentleman, respect himself, and avoid disrespecting himself to the point of becoming a ‘cunt’.
Many men today fall hopelessly in love with a woman, lose their self-respect, and over time, the woman begins to lose respect for him because he lost respect for himself. As a result, she becomes disinterested and falls out of love with him. A man must always be a man, not only for himself but also for his wife, girlfriend, or loved one; if he loses that, he loses her and everything else.
So, I carried on teaching all day until early evening, despite feeling unwell and unsure if the curry date was still on. Then, out of the blue, she sent me a message asking if it was.
Because I had not sent messages in a hopeless manner, it had created a question mark in her mind. Essentially, she’s needy and testing me at the same time. She called me, and she could tell I wasn’t 100%, but I said I was OK, as I genuinely didn’t want to let her down. It would be interesting to have a curry at Wetherspoons.
Would it be good, bad, or vomit?
She was strange, constantly trying to test me, but I was OK. We arranged for 7:00 p.m. I walked there, and everything was good. I arrived early at Wetherspoons, and to my surprise, it wasn’t that full. I managed to find a secluded booth where we could eat without being overheard by anyone nearby. These booths with their very high backrests are a little exaggerated, but still good. A waiter came over; I told him I was waiting for someone, and everything was fine.
Finally, Julie arrived, looking as beautiful as ever, with her blonde hair complementing her black blouse and fair skin. She sat down, and immediately the first topic was why I hadn’t called or sent a message, which was so predictable, with this being a kind of psychological projection.
I initially acted as if I was stupid and didn’t understand anything, which, to a certain extent, was true. I had work to do, and a man’s role is not to constantly send messages to his loved one; what kind of man is that? And what kind of woman needs that reassurance all the time? And what kind of relationship would it be?
These, even though I’m not explaining very well, are the main pillars of any healthy heterosexual relationship: the rules of each and the relationship itself, which are essential for overall well-being. We talked and talked, and I think she understood the boundaries I was setting, because at the end of the day, it’s not rocket science.
We ordered our Indian Baltis, and to my surprise, they arrived promptly and were better than I had expected. The presentation felt like an assembled food kit, with the waitress serving two curries simultaneously, along with curry bowls, rice, naan bread, and two poppadoms for each person. However, I could see that it was very thoughtfully executed, and since it’s Wetherspoons, the pricing was extremely reasonable for such reasonable quality.
The curry was surprisingly good. Nowadays, I am not a connoisseur of curries like I was maybe 40 years ago, when I would frequently visit curry houses while living in England. Indian food isn’t very popular in Rio or across Brazil, as cuisine is closely tied to colonial history, and Brazil doesn’t have a strong Indian or Pakistani community, making it difficult to find a good Indian restaurant in Rio.
I remember Gilda, an Indian woman who worked at the British Consulate in Praia da Flamengo in Rio many years ago. She helped me out a few times with passport problems and other issues. She finally retired and opened an Indian restaurant in Leblon, one of the best neighbourhoods in Rio. It did well for some time, but eventually closed.
Regarding colonies and their food influences: São Paulo is famous for Japanese cuisine, such as sushi and sashimi, due to Japanese influence, as well as pizza and Italian food because of Italian influence. In southern Brazil, a strong German colony and influence have led to the popularity of barbecue and meat dishes, partly due to the region’s cold climate.
In Rio, there is a significant influence from Spanish, Portuguese, and Italian colonies on the cuisine, while in Bahia, a state in the southeast of Brazil, there is a powerful African influence. Consequently, there is a notable presence of hot, spicy African-style foods.
I would say the Indian dishes were quite good, and we were as good as always. I was coughing a lot, and eventually it was time to leave earlier than I would have liked. The night was very enjoyable; I walked Julie home and then back to Wordsley.
Why do I like this special little woman so much?
In bed by 11:00 p.m.
Thank you.
Thanks for reading this blog post. Please explore my other posts and share your thoughts in the comments section.
Richard
